Life as a mommy!

So I haven't posted in a while because I have been consumed with baby life. If I'm not rocking Cole, I'm changing his diaper, feeding him, pumping, washing bottles, rinse and repeat. It is kind of overwhelming. Truthfully I am just now getting to the point where I don't feel like will never be the same. I mean it won't be the same, but I won't always be doing this. This is a phase. A hard phase, but I have Jared by my side to help through everything. He is absolutely wonderful. He helps out with everything and then some. Seriously, I don't know what I am going to do when he goes back to work....
He goes back to work tomorrow!! Every time I think about it, it makes me want to cry. He helps out so much and I can't imagine doing it all on my own. But I will have to. Yes, I have family and friends who will help, but it has been an awesome bonding experience for us. I have never felt closer to him ever before!!! It makes me love him even more, which I didn't think was possible. But we will survive:)
Cole is amazing!! He is a good baby, really! We are still working on sleeping at night. He still gets up every 2-3 hours to eat, but I can only feed him every 3 hours right now. In the past 2 days he has get VERY fussy with about 45 till he has to eat. Everyone tells me I can feed him more, but I waiting to talk to the dr. Speaking of the dr, we took him to his pediatrician the Friday after he was born and he did so good. They told us to undress him to his diaper and I thought for sure he would freak out. Nope, he just layed there. Even when she was checking him he just layed there looking around. I was so proud of him:)
Here are some pictures to enjoy of our growing boy!

First bath at home

Daddy and Cole snuggle time:)

I love this St.Patty's day pic!!

Our 1st family picture

Cole Ryan Love

Our baby boy is here:) Cole Ryan Love was born March 8 at 4:53pm. He was 8lb 5oz and 19in long. He is so precious and I couldn't ask for more. We love him so much! I thought I would write out his birth story before I forget some details!

We had an appointment at St.Ann's to be induced at 5am on Monday, March 8. We woke up at 3:30 excited and nervous and everything. We knew things would never be the same after that day!! Once we were there and checked in they started me on fluids. I was still only dilated to 1cm so they were trying to decide the next step. I had apparently been contacting almost every 2 minutes and didn't even know it. They ended up coming in and breaking my water. Let me tell you... that felt weird!! It didn't hurt, just very weird! Once they broke my water the contractions hit and hit hard!

Around 9:30 I was around 3cm I got an epidural. It wasn't as bad as I thought. Once that kicked in, I couldn't feel my right side at all!! My left side wasn't as bad. Around 11:30 my Aunt and Uncle were visiting and I starting getting horrible back pain and I could feel all the contractions on my left side. They had me lay on that side to move the medicine to that side. That didn't work. They had to call the med guy and give me another boost of the epidural. It finally kicked in and I was feeling better. From there, things progressed very quickly!

By 2:30 I was already 10cm and they wanted me to start pushing. I kinda freaked out a little! I couldn't believe it was time!! I did really well pushing at first. They figured I would deliver within the hour. Little did they know, my body didn't want to cooperate. About an hour or so into pushing, I started feeling EVERYTHING. My epidural wore off again on both sides. I couldn't believe it. I started crying and telling them I needed something for the pain. I can't explain how painful it was!!

I was totally not mentally prepared for this by any means. After 2hrs of pushing my Dr came in and said the only way to get rid of the pain was to deliver. I couldn't believe I was about to deliver without any meds. They called the med man back in and tried to give me another boost of epidural and another med to hopefully make me not feel as much. NOPE, my body didn't respond to any of those drugs. They got forceps out and said we have to deliver him now. It was the worst pain I've ever had!!

After about 10 minutes my baby boy was here. He was so perfect to me... even with his little cone head:) I couldn't believe he was here. He had a great set of lungs that's for sure. Recovery has been very very hard for me. I had a second degree episiotomy and another separate tear. The second day in the hospital I started getting extremely nauseous, so they ordered me a shot to help control it... but like the day before no meds helped me. So not only was I in pain I was super sick to my stomach. It is a very slow recovery and delivery I didn't expect, but he is worth it!! Here are some pics of our little man to enjoy!

40 Weeks...

Well, I've made it to my due date and then some:( *sigh* I went to the Dr Monday to find out if we would be inducing me or waiting another week. I was so nervous for this appointment because I just want to be holding my baby!! I met with a nurse practitioner, and I really liked her!! She explained everything and was really nice. When it was time to see if I'd had any progress I just held my breath (and squeezed Jared's hand:) She finally said, "Well, it looks like you are 1cm dilated and 70% effaced!!" Music to my ears. Even though 1cm isn't much...it's something. So she went and called the hospital to set up and induction date.

If Baby Love isn't here by Monday, I will be induced Monday, March 8 at 5am!! There is an end in sight!! Yahoo!!! I really don't want to be induced, but that means the sooner I will get to hold my little man. I am so excited and scared and nervous... you name it:) So I went to the mall to walk by myself yesterday and in the middle of the walk I started having contractions! I've never had contractions yet. It freaked me out because it hurt and I all I could think was, is this it?? So I went home and layed down to see if they went away. They eventually went away, but I felt like crap all day!! At least my body is starting to do something!!

Nikki and I went for a walk today and I had some contractions again, but nothing like yesterday. Time will tell, but I am praying that I go into labor on my own. I don't know why, but I am so nervous to get induced. I would love into labor naturally, but I am trusting my dr's and the medication. I am praying everything goes smoothly. Hopefully one of the next few posts I write will be... "He's HERE!!" Come on baby, Mama is waiting for you!!